Musings from my Window

A sweet note from first-grader, Lily.  I found myself teaching first grade earlier this week. It was a shock to my system because I have primarily substituted for the older grades this past year.   As I worked with little class I found myself toggling between feelings of compassion and annoyance. They were so needy and emotional. One little girl refused to be consoled when her Christmas tree that she was cutting did not turn out the way she planned--after three attempts. Several children would come to me to tattle on another child hurting their feelings. By break time I was slightly frazzled. I ran down to my friend Amanda's classroom to borrow two of her little stuffed owls. It was time for an episode of "Daw TV" with this band of first graders. Daw TV came about when I was substituting for Amanda last year. Two of her stuffed owls fell in front of the document camera on accident while we were getting ready for math. I, being funny started making them talk about ho

Listening to Jody Moore and Brooke Castillo has provided a lot of "aha" moments, but the biggest insight is that our thoughts are the drivers of everything in our lives.  This concept has blown me away the past few months. If I want to change anything, I do so by first changing my thinking. And so with this in mind, here are a few thoughts to look at when it comes to keeping a tidy home: "It is just one thing." --Not true! That cup in the sink will become 20. The outfit left on the floor cause your bedroom to look  like the changing rooms at Old Navy if not addressed pronto! "I'll do it later." --This is my favorite phrase, but it causes so much trouble in my life. Trevar has been the biggest teacher of the phrase, "Do it Now!" I used to put off unpacking from a vacation for a day or two, but after being married to Trevar I have followed his example and unpacked almost as soon as my feet enter my house. Sometimes I have wondered if I am s

Yesterday I had to run to rental property to check on a bathroom shower rip-out project. Julia, home from school came along for the ride. It has been about five years since Julia has returned to the home of her birth. The renters, some of the nicest people on the planet, have made it their home now. It was sobering for Julia due to the fact that our old house is now full of wall-to-wall stuff. The basement, where the project was taking place housed many items. The garage was very full with a makeshift four-wheeler repair shop set up. The front drive housed four cars--not one in the garage. Julia was shocked. "Mom, I don't even recognize our house!".  On the way home we talked about the differences. Now mind you, I love our renters and I am not judging them. They are doing the very best they can and I am grateful that they have been such reliable and kind renters over the years. Someday they will move, and take all of their stuff, and I will repaint and replace all of th

Meta communication--the idea that we are communicating volumes through our facial expressions and body language, and voice tone. It is thought by some psychologists that this form of communication is acatually louder and more persuasive taht actual words. The other day, I sat down to watch TV--a rare occurance. I sat and watched a drama. I could watch for very long because the acting was absolutely HORRIBLE! The actors were saying all the right words and trying their best to convey the seriousness and gravity of the situation, thought  their character would respond, but there was a lag and delay in how their body reacted. I could tell that they were not feeling  the depth of the situation, but were merely moving to their next line. The distortion was very subtle, and if you were caught up in the show, you would probably not notice it, because you would be filling in the emotional gaps that the actors had left.  It was maddening to me. I could not stand it and had to turn the televi

Well, my midlife crisis came to a head a few weeks ago. I had so many things planned differently this fall--teaching fourth grade. But instead I find myself here at home. Every option and plan fell through. I have struggled with finding my purpose--doing something more than the boring and mundane tasks of home. I felt chastened as I talked with my friend, Nadine at the bus stop while sending a daughter off to school. Nadine works full time while raising three very rambunctious children. While I was feeling sorry for myself to be "at home" Nadine expressed how she would give anything to be home right now raising her kids rather than going through the exhausting juggling of kids and career. I walked home feeling grateful for the opportunity to be home, but perplexed at what to do during the looming days and months ahead. I retreated to the indulgent vice of the internet. I sat on the couch. I surfed Facebook. I cleaned a few bathrooms and made a meal from time to time. I was de

My thoughts are over the place but I must write down a glimmer of insight that I had recently as Caleb's junior high track meet. The event was the 1600 meter race. As I watched these young boys labor through the four laps I found myself cheering everyone on. There is so much emphasis on winning in our society, but as I watched i realized that out of the hundreds of competitivors, only a small number would even make it to the podium, let alone place first. With those statistics in mind, I realized that for the boys I was watching, they were giving their all for a race they would most likely, never win. So why run, I wondered? And that is when my thinking shifted. I realized that these boys were running to win against themselves. And so, with each weary boy that passed by me, I saw them winning against fatigue and doubt. Each boy became their own champion. I stood in the stand and cheered each as each participant passed by me. I realized then, that such is the way of life. It is not